There and Back Again, an adoptive mothers week.

I know it's not fair to just say adoptive mother because this could be any mothers story, but it's my blog and therefore my story!

What a week. I'm glad it's almost over. How can one person withstand so many emotional mood swings in just a few days? Started the week hopeful to have an answer to the boys being legally free. No such luck. Crested the week wanting to hide in a cave and never come out. I searched and we don't have such Hobbit dwellings in Fallon. Ended the week lowering one little boys meds and waiting for the fallout. Not one day has gone according to plan. I know they never will, but I have hope.

I feel sorry for my husband who has to pick up the pieces of his emotionally weak wife after he has dealt with inmates all day. Actually, maybe I should trade places with him. He can tell people to get back in their cells and be quiet, Nice!

It's hard to tell if I'm getting through to the boys, Joey in particular. We have discussions, well, I lecture and ask him questions that he doesn't answer. We've had a lot of these episodes this week. I pray that he will open up to me and let me in.

I get really nervous when people praise me in the endeavor that we are in because I feel like such a failure 100 times a day. I know for a fact that the only way that I keep breathing every day and getting out of bed and loving this household is because Christ is the air, reason and love that I live in. When all else seems futile, He is all I can cling to.

He who knew NO sin became sin so that I might be righteous before God. That is why we do what we do. Not because I think I'm an exceptional mother, anyone who knows me knows that's not the truth, but because I serve an awesome God!